Baby

Tamra never wanted children. With her four siblings, the house was too loud and too chaotic growing up. At the age of fifteen, she vowed to never have a child and to focus on her career and get everything she not only needed but wanted.

But Thomas changed her life. He changed her priorities and made her see life in a different light. Everything was rosier and brighter. Everything smelled nicer, tasted better. Was softer to the touch. Her heart was full of love for him. For the man she married two years ago.

And now she felt the urge to complete their love in the most beautiful way possible. She couldn’t stop thinking about it. She caught herself daydreaming about it. It occupied her mind at night.

She pictured what the baby would get from each of them. She hoped it would have her husband’s beautiful brown eyes and full lips. His sense of humor and wit. Her messiness so they would drive Thomas nuts together. She wanted their unborn baby to have her creativeness, his savviness, and their drive.

But she was certain of one thing: the child of their love would be nothing but perfect. Nothing short of extraordinary. Everything they are and much more.

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What have you been reading/writing/doing?

I’ve been reading Everything is Fucked. I really enjoyed the author’s previous book (The Subtle Art of Not Giving a Fuck) but I am struggling with this one.

My husband and I have been watching quite a few shows. We finished Broadchurch, Chernobyl and When They See Us. I recommend each of them. When They See Us broke my heart but I believe everyone should watch it.

It’s been hectic here in India. We planned to travel to Kerala, a beautiful state with backwaters, hills, beaches, gorgeous cities and so much. But we had to postpone it because the monsoon is wreaking havoc. We’ve been trying to have some other adventures, like having a one-day sightseeing tour of Bangalore, going to see Hogenakkal Falls etc. And we’ve been making future plans for traveling as well.

But I need to get back to writing. There are just a few more pages left before I finish my current book. I want to jump into editing and complete the whole process to send it out this fall.

What are you up to? What are you reading and/or writing? What are you watching? Doing?

Echo

“It didn’t mean anything.”

The words he said through the door still echo in her mind. Each syllable was like a marble hitting her skull, trying to break through the bone. She didn’t think anything could pain her more than seeing the visual proof he had cheated but as soon as she heard his explanation the fragments of her broken heart smashed into dust.

She sat on the floor, her back straight and her head leaning against the door. She didn’t know if he had left. She didn’t know if she cared. She couldn’t get up because getting up meant she needed to go into a certain direction. She wasn’t ready to make a decision. She wasn’t ready to process it and yet she had to. He pushed her into this, he made her do this.

In one night, he burned everything they had built. In one moment, he destroyed everything. And yet… It didn’t mean anything.

It might not have meant anything. But it mattered. It mattered to her.

It Exists

Image result for true love

True love exists. It exists in novels, movies, songs. It exists in real life. It happens in fictional and actual stories.

How?

How do I know?

Because women, when they love truly and deeply, are capable of changing their men. They’re capable of transforming a cynic into a romantic, a player into a husband.

Why?

Because men, when they love truly and deeply and admit it to themselves, are capable of being changed. They’re capable of allowing their loved ones to change them. And they provoke change from their partners too.

Are you sure?

Not believing in true love is a hopeless place where there is no room for improvement, for evolution. It has no trust, no respect. It’s a world doomed from the start. True love prevails everything.

Mirror, mirror on the wall, who’s the most stupidest of them all?

I have this quote that I got from my mom, a quote that I like to repeat to others and myself as advice, and that is: You don’t have to explain it to smart people, and you can’t explain it to stupid people.

It’s not about insulting anyone; it’s not about actual intelligence because smart people can be stupid and vice versa. It basically means that it’s not worth wasting your time and energy on trying to make arrogant and selfish people, who are dumbly convinced about being right (always), see the point. But following that principle, walking away when you realize you’re talking to a person that actually shares their IQ with a brick wall is hard to do.

I think it’s very challenging to be quiet when you know something is wrong, incorrect, untrue and unjust. I find myself at a crossroads mulling over what my reaction should be. It drives me absolutely certifiably mental to know that speaking up will not bring me, or them, or anyone else involved anything. It won’t make the person who is in the wrong see what’s right, do what’s right, or God forbid, admit their wrongdoing.

I feel a strong sense of justice and it’s hard for me to let it go once I find any sort of deception. I’m like a dog with a bone. I want everyone involved to see it, feel it, understand it… I want the culprit to be confronted. Even though speaking up won’t bring the results I want, even though it won’t affect the future actions of this person, it’s so unbelievably hard to choose to ignore it and walk away from it. I want people to know I know they lied. I don’t want people that deceive and manipulate people and facts for their benefit to win. And I feel that silence hands them the victory.

No one should be convinced that they know it all. Not a boss or an employee, not an authoritative figure or a subordinate. No one has the right to lie, manipulate facts and people for their benefit. I refuse to stand by and let you do this to me or anyone else. It might make me uncomfortable but I don’t care. There is no growth in comfort. 

You might think “What has brought this on?” A person that has a pattern of twisting facts and words to fit their narrative. I’ve seen it be done to others and now, for the last time, I’ve had it done to me. I am too far away to deal with this situation face to face but that will change. And once it does… Knock, knock.

 

How do you deal with conflict? With people that you think are in the wrong?   Would you rather be quiet and move on? Or would you confront them?

Check-in

I’m sure you’re far too busy to notice when I unplug from the Internet but I just couldn’t find the time to blog or be active on social media. We flew back home last week and you can imagine what my days look like now since I hadn’t seen my family for six months. There is no routine, no writing and absolutely no posting of any kind. I simply want to be present in the moment, enjoy every second of our visit so that I can collect as many memories as possible and make the time until our next visit more bearable and enjoyable.

I did, however, just finish reading The Kiss Quotient. I’m not kidding…I put it down this second. Well, before having lunch, doing the dishes, making coffee, replying to some texts, etc. You know, this second. 🙂 I loved the book and both characters in it. I found it to be the perfect easy and entertaining read. I will definitely read some more of her books.

The next one I’m reading is Mark Manson’s Everything is Fucked. I liked his debut and I don’t think this one will disappoint either.

Tell me… What are you up to? What are you reading? Have you read the books mentioned?

Once upon a Time

Once upon a time, there was a woman who had a special surprise for you. She taunted you with it, made you believe you desperately needed it, made you realize that your life depended on it.

The Snowhite’s red apple had nothing on this. You desired it more than the Prince running around frantically with a glass slipper in his hands. More than Belle wanting adventure.

You want it.

You need it.

You have to have it.

So go to Amazon because Eclipse is going to be free today.